Lastly, you will learn about uninvolved parenting, which is exactly what it says, uninvolved! After years of research and many studies, researchers have found that parents’ parenting styles generally impact a child’s developmental outcome. Authoritative parenting method The style which Banding and other researchers have found to be most beneficial to children is the authoritative parenting method. “Kids raised by authoritative parents are more likely to become independent, self-reliant, socially accepted, academically successful, and well-behaved” (Dewar, 2010, Para. ). Many studies have shown this to be the case even across multiple cultures and ethnic backgrounds. Instead of emending “my way or the highway” obedience, as in the authoritarian style, or giving children extreme freedom from defined rules and standards, as in the permissive style, authoritative parents work in the middle of these two styles. An authoritative parent will provide clear and firm limits and expectations while allowing the child some freedom to work within the limits in order to achieve the set goals.
Authoritative parents seek to teach their children through love, guidance, reasoning and constructive discipline. Where it can be said that permissive parents over emphasize love and return and authoritarian parents lack love and nurture, the authoritative parent seeks to find the proper balance of love with discipline. Authoritative parents “are responsive, nurturing, and involved… They take a firm stand, expecting their kids to behave responsibly… While showing high levels of warmth, and they emphasize reasons for rules” (Dewar, 2010, Para. 15-19).
This approach is misinterpreted by some as cold and unaffectionate, but this interpretation is unfounded. “Children are the very center of this parenting style, and their needs are given the utmost consideration” (Danish, 201 2, Para. ). The goal of this style is to prepare the child for a healthy and productive adulthood. When the child leaves home to forge their own path in life he or she must have the maturity, discipline, and skill-set to allow for the opportunity to succeed. An adult person must be able to reason, choose, and understand consequences of actions.
It is through this balance of love and discipline that authoritative parents prepare their children for their futures. A parent who loves their child will want them prepared for life outside of the childhood home, and the authoritative style has shown to be very successful t accomplishing this goal. Teaching the child, through guidance and instruction, is the center piece of this parental style. An authoritative parent wishes to teach his or her child maturity, responsibility, independence, and understanding (Danish, 2012, Para. 6).
An authoritative parent is likely to work with his or her child in a Viscosity like manner in which a reciprocal teaching method is employed allowing the child to learn not only how to accomplish a task, but the ever important “why” the task should be accomplished. It can be frustrating for the children to learn in a guided style with a more hands of approach from the parents. Acquiring new skills is never easy, “but with love and encouragement (and the ability to resist the incredible urge to do it for them), children learn patience as well as emotional control.
The constant learning process and the constant expectation to do things for themselves will teach children to remain calm and keep their emotions in control rather than lashing out in tantrums” (Danish, 201 2, Para. 10). This ability to teach a child to avoid resorting to tantrums in youth may help teach the child to learn emotional control over stress and anxiety as an adult. The authoritative reasoning style of instruction is complimented by proper punishment.
This reasoning-punishment method has shown positive results in studies, “One major finding was that the combined use of reasoning and punishment was more effective in delaying misbehaver recurrences than was either one alone … Punishment communicates to the child that he or she should have made a better choice. The reasoning component clarifies what that choice should have been and why’ (Larger, 1998, Para. 10 & 25). A child who understands not only what to do, but also why to do it is much more likely to be able to cake correct decisions in independent settings.
While authoritative parenting cannot guarantee 100% of children raised this way will be successful adults, it has shown that the majority tend to have happier dispositions, good emotional control and regulation, well developed social skills, and self confidence in their abilities to learn new skills (Cherry). Children raised this way have been shown to have rich relationships with their parents and higher resistance to peer pressure. It is a style which seeks form a mature, healthy, happy, responsible person through a balance of love, reasoning, expectations, and discipline.
Love needs to be balanced with discipline and the authoritative parenting style is the balanced approach to pa renting. Uninvolved parenting method Some years later after more extensive research was done, a fourth style known as uninvolved parenting was added. Uninvolved parenting, or sometimes known as, neglectful parenting, is a style characterized by a lack of responsiveness to a child’s needs. Uninvolved parents make few to no demands of their children and they are often indifferent, dismissive or even completely neglectful. These parents have little to no emotional involvement with their kids.
They provide for basic needs like food and shelter, but they are totally uninvolved in their children’s lives personally. The degree Of involvement however, can vary quite a bit. Some uninvolved parents may be pretty much hands-off with their kids, but may still have some basic limits such as curfews. Others may be downright neglectful or even reject their children outright. Uninvolved parents are emotionally distant from their children. They offer little to no supervision, show little warmth, love, and affection towards their children.
They have few or no expectations of demands for behavior. Their children simple do as they please. If a child is misbehaving in school most likely an uninvolved parent wouldn’t even go to a parent- teacher conference. If their child had a school even they wouldn’t attend that either. You may even say they intentionally avoid their children. The parent may have so much going on in their personal life they feel overwhelmed and distracted to deal with their children. Parents who exhibit an uninvolved parenting style were often themselves raised by uninvolved and dismissive parents.
As adults, they may find themselves repeating the same patterns they were raised with. Other parents who display this style may simply be so caught up in their busy lives that they find it easier to take a hands-off approach to dealing with their children. Children raised by uninvolved parents must learn to provide for themselves. They tend to have a fear of becoming dependent on others for anything because they can’t even depend on their own parents, and are scared to be let down. Often children raised by uninvolved parents are emotionally withdrawn.
The lack of emotional responsiveness and love from their caretakers causes children raised by uninvolved parents to have great difficulty forming attachments eater in life. Researchers associate parenting styles with a range of child outcomes in areas such as social skills and academic performance. The children of uninvolved parents generally perform poorly in nearly every area of life. These children tend to display problems in cognition, attachment or emotional skills, and social skills. Uninvolved parenting is characterized by little to no interaction between a parent or parents and the child (Rene).
This style of parenting first researched by the developmental psychologist, Banding (1960), and is also known as neglectful parenting. Her findings on his parenting style were very disheartening and disturbing to me. These parents take care of the child’s basic needs and have little to no supervision. Uninvolved parenting ca use the children to become fearful of dependency on others, have many misbehaving, and they tend to grow up faster than what is average. These parents do not show love and affection towards their children, or attend parent-teacher conferences, nor participate in school events.
The children in turn raise themselves because most of the time the parents are too involved with their own lives and tend to neglect the needs of the child. It is seen in today’s society in the younger generation of parents or those that are overachievers for self. Parents become consumed in their selves they have children for the wrong reasons and the child pays for the decision in a major way. As you can see In our generation today many young people become substance abusers due to the amount of stress one had to deal with in the younger years.
These children become emotionally withdrawn from others. They tend to become violent and don’t care for the consequences that follow. Most of the time these children lack socially and academically, they develop owe self-esteem, and lack of self-control. It’s very concerning to understand why parents choose this type of parenting. Perhaps the parents were neglected in their childhood. Some that exhibit this behavior are caught up in work and materialistic things, which make them, push their children away and it is hard for them to realize what they are not doing for their child.
This is very detrimental to the child and in the elder years of the parent, it will affect them once it sets in their mind how the neglected their child for their own happiness or reasons. Permissive parenting method Being that there are our parenting styles that most define our society, you have to wonder which of the four is the best parenting style for you and your child and which is most effective. Based on Kinder Cherry’s research, permissive parenting can be referred to as indulgent parenting. Parents who exhibit this style make relatively few demands upon their children.
Due to these parents having low expectations for self-control and maturity, they rarely discipline their children. According to Banding, permissive parents “are more responsive than they are demanding”. Meaning that they allow considerable self- exultation and avoid most confrontation, a few ways to tell whether a parent is permissive or not is to see if, they have few rules and standards towards behavior, are usually very nurturing and loving towards their children, often seem more like a friend than a parent, and may use gifts or food as bribery to make a child behave.
The effects of permissive parenting can be corrupt; it can lead to lack of self-discipline, poor social skills at times, very demanding, and may feel insecure. In recent study, permissive parenting was found to potentially cause underage drinking and can also be linked to other behaviors such as drug use and other misconduct. Research shows that you should always set limits with your kids. It allows your kids to have the opportunity to develop self-discipline. When there are not any limits set, you have many consequences to deal with.
Markham states that children learn that disappointment and sadness are intolerable when their parents will do anything to make sure they are only ever happy. This can cause the children to do whatever it takes in their life to avoid the feeling. That can mean that they will cheat to win or insisting that she must have her way. Permissive arenas are not only bad about setting limits to their children, but they will make constant compromises about things that are important to them. They may allow their children to undermine them and treat them wrong.
They may also allow them to over indulge in television, computer time, or video games causing them to mess up their education. This causes parenting to become less rewarding due to the fact that your children are not accomplishing academically or anything that is beneficial to their future. Permissive may have a few aspects in common with authoritative parenting UT they as well have considerable differences. ‘Demimondaines” refers to behavioral control that a parent has over child. While ” Responsiveness” refers to the parents emotional warmth and support for their child.
Permissive is high in responsiveness and low in the amount of demands. Education. Com. States that permissive parents do not require mature behavior from their children, leaving authoritative parenting to be high in both response and the amount of demands making it the best choice of all parenting styles. Authoritative parents set limits for their children, require certain behavior, ND allow their children to learn from their mistakes to help build self- discipline. Authoritarian parenting method Due to the many different parenting styles it is a constant debate on which the best approach to raising children is and which the worst is.
After researching Diana Bandannas’ different types of parenting styles (Child Development, pages 887-907) came to the conclusion that the authoritarian method of parenting is not ideal for several reasons. In Banding’s book she describes the authoritarian parent as controlling. The authoritarian parent attempts to shape, control, and evaluates the behavior and attitudes of the child in accordance with a set standard of conduct, which usually is an absolute standard, theologically motivated and formulated by a higher authority (Page 890).
Authoritarian parents have high expectations of their children and have very strict rules that they expect to be followed unconditionally. Continuing on, to fully understand the authoritarian parent; they value obedience as a virtue and favor punitive, forceful measures to curb self-will at points where the child’s actions or beliefs conflict with what the parent thinks is correct conduct (Banding). The authoritarian parent also does not encourage verbal give and take; they believe the child should accept their word for what is correct.
In other words, people using this parenting style often utilize punishment rather than discipline, but are not willing or able to explain the reasoning behind their rules or actions. The authoritarian parenting style may also have negative side effects on the child. The child could be anxious, withdrawn, and have an unhappy disposition. They could have poor reactions to frustration too. For instance, with girls, they are more likely to give up and boys are more likely to become specially hostile.
On the other hand with authoritarian parenting the child does well in school and is not likely to engage in antisocial activities. Some antisocial activities are as follows, drug and alcohol abuse, vandalism, and gangs. Children with authoritarian parents also tend to associate obedience and success with love. Among of the things already stated above, authoritarian parenting undermines the parent-child relationship. Parents who relate punitively to their kids have to cut off their natural empathy for their children, which make the relationship less satisfying to both parent and child.
Parenting also becomes much harder for these parents because their kids lose interest in pleasing them and become more difficult to manage (What’s Wrong with Strict Parenting). From my reading, strict parenting ends up to make unhappy parents. Children who are parented strictly end up fighting with parents and carrying a chip on their shoulder. As they look for love in all the wrong places. The bottom line is that strictness does not work in creating better-behaved kids; in fact it sabotages everything positive parents do and handicaps their children in their efforts to develop emotional self-discipline.
The way that arenas choose to raise their children should be thought out carefully however through all of the reading it seems to be something that cannot really be controlled unless the parents are educated on the subject. There is not really a right way of going about it seeing as everyone is different which means that the different methods would be better suited for some and not work for others. It would be foolish to try to say that there is only one way that raising a child can be done because there is not a clear cut path it is more general guidelines as to what has been working (Propeller 2014).
In the past it as thought that there was only three parenting types and as people continued research the fourth method which is uninvolved parenting was brought to light which shows that as we continue learning and observing the relationship between children and their guardians we may find other ways to raise the children that would be more effective than what we as a whole are doing now. The writing illustrates the dangers and the advantages of being lenient with children as they grow up, balancing both being strict and lenient, or just being strict the entire time and demanding respect but sometimes setting in fear.